Ups And Downs

The up news:
My brother is moving out!! Yay! He found himself a new place all by himself too. He's not a computer person but I showed him how to find Craig's List and he busily got to work. I mean, he didn't even have "clicking" skills and now he's navigating around all by himself. Good for him! He was impressed with all the rooms for rent in his price range. He found a nice neighborhood back in our home town (where he wanted to be) and will be learning to live with 3 strangers (3 men) in a two story home. They accepted him after the first meeting and apparently weren't phased with the lack of work history. I doubt they did a credit check either. He just flashed the $400 dollars deposit and that was all they needed from him. Hurray for sloppy leasers! This is the first time he will be living with someone that isn't family or an old friend. I hope he finds it a learning experience and I really hope he finds a J O B. Likely that won't happen until they stop giving him extensions on his unemployment checks (been over 2 years now!). Not that I'm against getting hand outs that long when you really NEED it, but a LEAST make an effort in trying to find work. Well, I won't jump on that soap box now. I'm just happy that I will, once again, have my extra bed room available and that I can stop fretfully "shushing" my son every single morning as he speaks in his louder-than-most voice (and he's a talker--which I love, most of the time) so that someone can sleep in as long as they'd like and do nothing with their day. Bitter some? Not really. Just frustrated!!!! It's such a wasted life.
Until last night I thought he'd like living somewhere else since he seemed genuinely unhappy most of the time, scowled at my son at seemingly every turn, and walked around like the world owed him something. But no. I was wrong. While speaking with my mom last week (she was sworn to secrecy but that never applies to us, lol), he mocked me "She needs her own space." in that whiny kind of voice that goes along with mocking.
Reeeeeally!
Well, I think he's being ridiculous. I get to chose how to live my life in my own house and I refuse to live with a sour puss any longer. But the most pressing and important factor: he's a lousy role model for my son. And I could go on but I won't. It's not worth our time. I've decided not to tell him exactly why he needs to move and all that bugs me because I'm afraid it would just cause a big rift between us and stuff like that doesn't generally get forgotten/forgiven between adults. (OK, and I'm not good with confrontation, I confess.) We should really learn from children on getting past disagreements. I have a lot to learn too. (Hence, the neighbor across the street issue.)
On the down side:
Mark flaked again. OMG. That makes 4 times in a short row. Well, the first time we sort of cancelled on each other equally, but the next 3 times it was all him. As I wrote before, he phoned last week and then he said he would like to visit on Thursday or Friday. He still hasn't phoned. No email message. Nothing. It's so disappointing. I had such hopes since our phone conversations flow so easily. And now I'm in the same position: can't/won't call him but still sorta want to meet with him to see how a face to face meeting goes. Honestly, I really don't need friends I can't trust to do what that said they would do.
I'm just....disappointed.
And back to square one.
One advantage: something has changed within me and I think I now have more courage to try and stir up something (well, it waxes and wanes day to day) with interesting men that I happen to notice around me. Hopefully some of them are unattached and emotionally in the same place I am.
In the mean time, T still keeps picking up every dandelion seed head that he sees in his path (there are tons this time of year), blowing on it to disperse every last seed, while wishing out loud, "I wish I had a baby." He's gotten a few completely naked down to the stem and quickly checks in with me that maybe NOW he'll get his wish.....
Sweet boy.